30 January 1995

Master, today on the SubMiss list the posts were addressing long distance relationships. I thought so often we post of our love our devotion that I should post of our struggles as well… Yesterday issues came up for us that were directly a result of the distance between us.

The following is the post I speak of….

The following is a letter I wrote to my Master explaining issues in a long distance relationships ….The issues are often the same as in every day life but the solutions can not be same…. he can not truly grab my hair and place my face to the floor stepping gently on my neck holding me in place …. he can tell me when we meet next time this will happen but there are limitations…. I must take a great deal of responsibility in this …. in areas that in flesh to flesh contact would rarely happen …

Now Master and I have an incredible relationship that he guards with vigilance and we nurture …. yet I struggle and this is disturbing to Master …. I was pleased to see this thread as it is true for so many of us who use the computer as one of our tools of communication….. what follows is long and I am sure not of interest to those who have the good fortune to wake up side by side …. perhaps collared to the bed…. bound in each others arms… but for us this is our reality a situation I never intended to be in till Master claimed me and here I am … smiling…

I send this in the spirit of offering the flip side of the coin … to this magical road I travel with Master…. So often we spill over with what we perceive as our perfect love …. here is another part of that tapestry… ah the textures the colors the laughter the tears that life offers….

all my love to you all natasha

(refer to yesterday’s entry for letter)

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