26 January 1995

I found the preceding poetry in my e-mail this morning when I came home from the gym. It seems that my sweet submissive soul was hard at work .. again.. gifting me with not only her delicious surrender but also a beautiful picture painted with words (god i love you natasha ). I am in love with all the poetry she has given me over the last 5 months… a few pieces brought tears to my eyes (im not ashamed to say). This work has stunned me however.. because she used so many of the words I use when we are together.. when I am training her .. sharing truths.. or otherwise exposing our souls and shame to one another … she used my phrases as building blocks to create this amazing poem.

It got me thinking.. ( i tend to be introspective.. even brood from time … [privately smiling at natasha] ) and thought this might be material for a good thread. We have both grown so much since we have been together.. made so many wonderful discoveries.. There is a wondrous and mysterious truth to the ‘Power Exchange’ relationship. I hesitate to use the word total because nothing is total.. our exchange is as full and rich as we make it. Continuous ebb and flow exists.. like tidal changes in a large body of water.. and it has steadily deepened and intensified since we began. We consider the exchange to be total.. with the understanding that it is almost an entity unto itself.. always changing.. always growing.

natasha is as much a woman as I have ever known.. her inner strength and beauty is an awesome sight to behold.. In the real world (a man’s world.. rightly or wrongly).. she can go toe to toe with virtually any man.. leaving weak men in her wake. I guess that is what makes her surrender and submission so much more special and intrinsically valuable to me. As strong a woman/person as she is.. she is secure enough in her womanhood to be a girl.. my girl…. my girlie girl… and at times.. ( smiling.) .. my little girl.

In our exchange.. she gives me dominion over her.. and takes back control only when I give it to her. In turn.. I surrender to what I consider to be a power greater than me.. and that is the exchange itself.. Ever watchful.. vigilante .. concerned with protecting what we have.. not allowing her, me or anyone else spoil its purity. Any contaminants that do make their way into our circle by way of human frailty ( such as dishonesty.. mistakes.. fear.. doubts etc ) I deal with immediately.. by talking about them.. shining a light on them.. exposing them.. not allowing them to fester.. and grow.

Its amazing.. as we both surrender to the needs of the exchange.. we are bathed in waves of peace.. countless psychic connections.. and both sweet flowing and deliciously violently sensuality. The power exchange truely makes the whole, greater than the sum of the parts. Together we are stronger than when we are alone. When one of us misplaces our priorities by taking primary focus off of the exchange for one reason or another.. the results are *always* the same.. we lose the peace.. get out of sync.. (lafffing).. our diary is riddles with examples of this. I always tell natasha that I am grateful for the problem after we resolve it… as Nietzsche said “That which does not kill us makes us stronger”. I truly believe this. I am very happy to be in the habit of knowing how to get our exchange back on track when we cause it to faulter.

My point to all of this is to simply state…. a power exchange is a magical union that transcends knowledge of the mind.. I believe it to be spiritual in nature ( though obviously I cannot prove it ).

And again .. natasha… my sweet princess.. my soul.. thank you so much for this poem.. I love you with all my heart and soul.


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