The Living Diary of a Submissive

I see you in my thoughts Master… through naked eyes sitting in a chair … You gazing at me intently unwavering …me before you exposed, naked …I Look at you Master and your eyes tell me of your passion …like a blind man reading Braille you memorize each inch of my body… your hand reaching out to caress my face. Your hand travels slowly from my cheek leaving a burning trail …I feel your touch as it captivates me ….enchants me…you examining every inch of my skin the only movement our breathing and your hand’s slow exploration as you seek to know all of me.. my eyes close lost in a daze… I impart to you all I am and know that is what you desire what you require, no matter what the color or the texture my revelation to you is , I know all I give you, you embrace. These are not empty words spoken Master… They are the essence of what we are, no shame, no taboos, just acceptance reaching one barrier crossing it with ease looking back and wondering how we got here so easily… Looking ahead I see no walls no blockades but you tell me there are many I take your hand and walk bye your side and as we stride forward I look back and see we have yet crossed another wall but I never saw it till I was on the other side… Thank you Master my slavery has become my freedom… I adore you. ?

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I look at you and smile gently… reaching into the shadowy darkness you have held in your heart… My dark prince… My Master and I whisper I am your light… As you stand before me solid and unwavering strong… I whisper to you come with me into the light that I may lean against you feel your strength and warm you with my light… the perfect fit… the misty light and the solid night …

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Rubbing my cheek against the bulge above your muscular thighs I kiss you and nibble gently… I give myself up to your dominion completely. The focus of my universe is your pleasure my Master… I tremble with our slow kisses and am driven to the edge of madness by our passion. My every desire my every dream is for you of you and in you. Our devotion has no beginning no end. When you call me saying come to me angel …it is with purity I come to you… I adore you My Master… ?

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* natasha moans as she takes her masters kiss
{natasha} Master I was thinking of the man who said “you Masters have it so easy” the
other night and how that just isn’t so.
{Artful} we’ll I can see how it must look to an outsider
{natasha} so often Masters have to bear the decisions so much more alone as in
this circumstance: when I decide to do something i never do it alone
because I obey my master and have that stength behind me
{Artful} they *do* say its lonely on the top smile
{natasha} Laughs: but it is an important point in the power exchange a huge give
and take certainly I do things I may not really wish to
{Artful} i see it as an equal yet opposite exchange
{natasha} but you bear the consequeses  of that request you have to keep us on
tract and constantly correct the course and I trust you to always do it
{Artful} yes.. but I get so much from you.. that it softens these difficult decisions….
and it fills my need
{natasha} but it is subtle point vanilla people just can not grasp… it is to deep to
intense
{Artful} yes.. they fear going as deep, and with it the loss of control
{natasha} I do not know if it is fear or ignorance they do not understand…they have
not walked in our shoes
{Artful} no they have not my darlng
{natasha} We judge ourselves by our best intentions, our most noble acts, and our
most virtuous habits. We are judged by our last worst act, and also judged
by ignorance. I feel judgement is such a dangerous thing and I fight that in
myself
{Artful} its wise to be cautious of that character trait… to be discering without being
judgemental.. is a fine line to walk..  and like all character traits…
a double edged sword
{Artful} we have an intensity about us…that people fear.. but it is
a fear of them selves?

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I love how we say Good morning, how we bare our souls I love everything about us… I loved this little morning interlude would love to put it in my diary Master….It is so tipical of how our devotion spills out….

{Artful} God you are so open to me
{Artful} It’s as if you turn yourself inside out for me
{`natasha} Yes I do  Master I am yours inside and out
{Artful} My love for you strengthens
{Artful} You satiate my insatiability
{Artful} You keep me well fed moment by moment
{`natasha} I adore you Master you are my hero
{Artful} You are the lost half of my soul, missing .. now found
{Artful} The second we touched we felt it
{Artful} You read my cries for you
{Artful} Like in a spiritual lost and found
{`natasha} AND YOU adore my cries, my moans, my whimpers for you …laughing softly
{Artful} God I do adore them.. I consume and devour them….
{Artful} I long, ache and hunger for them
{Artful} You have found a man that has a perpetual hunger for you
{Artful} A perfect effortless love
{`natsha} And I long to feed you what you need from a gentle caress to my screams in
the night as you use me for your pleasure
{Artful} Even the hard parts seem rather effortless
*`natsha Smiles tenderly pressing her lips to you
*Artful extends his tongue.. washing over her full lips
{`natasha} Our life is so passionate that even our declarations of committment are burning infernos
…How i adore you My Master
{Artful} Your words and affirmations send throbbing waves of liquid electricity from my
stomache through my organ
{`natasha} My lips burn where you touch them and my heart sings
{`natasha} Giggles not to mention the endless twitching of this wet pussy
{Artful} We have an un-ending supply of what the other needs
{Artful} *MY* twiching pussy - smiling
{`natasha} smiles and molds her body yo your arching looking up our passion , love, respect
reflected in on anothers eyes yes my love this pussy is yours only yours…
{Artful} God I love you
{Artful} Feeling you pressed against me
{Artful} A perfect fit

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Thoughts on my Master and my submissiveness

Master above all else I trust you and my greatest desire is to please you. Your power your stength your tenderness fills me with wonder. My body my mind my soul my every breath are yours for your pleasure and your pleasure only. I will submit to you in all ways …

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My Master My Heart My Every Thought…I walk to you smiling knowing that all you desire I will give you with an open heart filled with joy … I will obey your every wish if you hunger for my screams …… I shall scream out in passion. If you hunger for my gentle caresses I will stroke you for hours. How content I am in YOUR pleasure. To sit by your feet while we work side by side… Looking up into your loving eyes and knowing we are two parts of the same soul….I adore you…

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My Dear Master My Heart:

Just a little note to tell you my Master my heart that I accept and appreciate your concerns with my behavior this morning. I know that the reason you disciplined me was not because I questioned your decision… but the thought process that led to my dissension. It wrenches my heart to think that I offended and disappointed you or that I caused you any uneasiness.

I am so appreciative Master that you care so much for me that your deep sense of Mastery over me …never let my obstinance sway your decisions and you proceeded to correct the situation and my impudence ….so my surrender can be pure and clean and deep.

I give you all that I am all, all my thoughts, all my dreams, all I will be my submission to you is unconditional and I did not display that deep commitment to you today.

I thank you Master for your steadfastness in the face of my opposition and I appreciate that you did not punish me for my thoughts but for these two things.

1. When you asked me to tell you what I was thinking I said no… those were not my thoughts to keep they are yours and I was wrong. Every thought every breath every little thing I do, I do for my Master and when I don’t it is destructive to my surrender and our precious connection.

2. I was so wrong not to just relinquish and obey…. you are my master I trust your wisdom and I did not exhibit it by my behavior today. I put my own feelings before yours and I know that is what displeased you so deeply. Had I been putting my Master first that would not have transpired and I know better….I know when I put “You First” all me needs are taken care of. If I had put “You First” I would never have questioned Your judgment as I know all that you do is to protect the magic we experience as Master and slave.

submissvely erotically and completely yours,

`natasha

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I wait to see my Master appear… ready to please him…. be it his loving lashes …quiet conversation….or deep penetrating looks… we sink blissfuly into each others hearts and souls. I always wonder what magic will happen when I am in his presence. Will his loving dominace send me to that sea of calm to that magical world of sub-space or will our laughter fill our ears and hearts. It does not matter where he takes me … For he has taken me and claimed me as his own.

submissively Yours `natasha ?

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Master
I kneel at your feet
to follow your command
I give you all that I am
I love you I am your slave
and you are my lord and master
I’m willing to do anything to please you …

`natasha

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I offer you my inner self all my joys, all my fears, I know it is up to me to relinquish, surrender even when it is difficult. To share my moments of faltering as well as the hours of joy. The joy is so easy to share the fears, the thoughts of rebellion much harder When my thoughts are not of putting you first it troubles me so. All my thoughts my dreams my desires belong to you, and I give them to you without hesitation. I adore you so much I can not bear to disappoint you. You give me endless pleasure even my pain is pleasure as it is to please you. I am content just to sit at your feet for hours while we work on our projects together.

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Master it is late at night or should I say early in the morning and I am thinking of You…as I always do as you fill my mind, my heart, my soul, to say nothing of what you do for my body (giving you a saucy grin). When you slide down to the floor where I am kneeling before you, sit behind me and wrap your arms about me I feel your loving gaze as you pull back my head I feel the sense of urgency that grips my soul wanting to feel your warm lips on my neck my heart pounds and nothing matters except Your possession and the pleasure I give you. I wish you could hold me forever like that never let me go……. I adore you my Master

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I moaned as he sucked hard, leaving light bruises all over my skin. And these words came to mind:

Passion
it is the essence of the soul
caressing the mind
touching the heart
to feel passion
is to feel life
there is nothing like it
it creeps forward
no control
the body responds
there are no rules
just feel.
I adore you my Master ?

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Master, this entry is a quiet little conversation we had… one of many we have had. I sit at your feet and absorb like a sponge your wisdom, your thoughts, your love and your domination. There are so many things that leave an impression on my soul during the course of the day. So many things you say, so many wonderful moments, so much passion. This is one of our quiet moments that touched my heart.

*Artful opens his mouth slightly… yielding to the slaves tongue.. loosening his grip slightly..
Artful: god - its amazing how dominating you… centers *me*
natasha: Groaning as you loosen your grip shivering I can not believe what submitting to you
does for me
natasha: it thrills me
natasha: it makes me complete
Artful: you are perfect for me
natasha: I love how you always take control
natasha: it is the little things you do that so often thrill me
Artful: little things such as what my darling
natasha: you are a consummate Dom
natasha: such as catching it when I called you Art
Artful: yes.. I don’t care for that
natasha: I noticed, laughing delightedly rubbing her bottom.
natasha: those things please me they let me know that every little thing I do is important…
natasha: though I am not what you call hard core I am submissive to the soul
natasha: I long to please
Artful: your submission is perfect
Artful: none of my others have been able to let go as you have
natasha: and controlled but not a door mat
natasha: It is Master? You honor me.
natasha: thank you
natasha: what do you mean let go
Artful: not held a piece of their heart from me
Artful: and the first I’ve not held my heart from
natasha: oh no Master it is all yours to the point is frightens me I have no defenses up
Artful: nor do I
Artful: we are both naked
Artful: our shame bared
natasha: Is that true?
natasha: thank you my love my heart
natasha: funny you should say that
Artful: i’d not say it were true, were it not
natasha: when people asked me what I was seeking
natasha: I said
natasha: I seek to be able to go to that place where you take no others
natasha: no secrets
natasha: no lies
Artful: only our naked souls
natasha: to the wall we all hide behind
natasha: I think it is called ones shame
natasha: ones fears
natasha: the place you never let another touch
natasha: But Master you know what
natasha: I do not think they knew of what I spoke
Artful: no.. most do not
natasha: and now you just went and used the same words
Artful: shame is a spiritual issue
Artful: it is the feeling we get…
Artful: there is something born in us…
Artful: that makes us feel like the center of our own universe… as a God…
Artful: then there is reality..
Artful: the realization that we are the antithesis of God..
Artful: though we try hard
Artful: this realization makes us feel inadequate
Artful: that deep down feeling is shame
Artful: and we live our lives
Artful: trying to hide that from each other
Artful: even though we are all the same in that regard
Artful: so we do any thing we can….
Artful: lie.. mislead… whatever
Artful: so another cannot see our shame
Artful: intimacy…
Artful: breaks through that shame
Artful: I call it in-to-me-see
Artful: look in me… and see what I am
Artful: can you love me when you do
Artful: can you natasha?
*`natasha looks at you her eyes wet, yes Master. That is the places I want to be able to be with you so nothing lies between us
natasha: without question
natasha seals her words to your lips with a kiss
natasha: how can I not love you when I am but a part of you
natasha: yours to use
Artful: as we grow. we will look deeper into one another
natasha: to thrill in to cherish or to whip
Artful: we must accept
Artful: what we see
natasha: do those words make you feel like they make me feel?
Artful: they thrill me
natasha: that total acceptance on both our parts
Artful: and soothe me at the same time
natasha: Master can this be my diary entry
natasha: I love it
Artful smiles… yes my treasure.

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So many times in the past…. though I had and have many friends and have been cared for by magnificent Masters I felt a weariness a loneliness though many were there for me caring and supporting me sharing my joys and my sorrows. This feeling reverberated through my heart so many times…. There was a loneliness a piece missing. Though many were so good to me, I kept seeking searching. Then we met it is as if You already knew my needs by looking into the depths of my soul. So quickly, so unexpectedly, You filled that little spot that had never been filled. I came to you in friendship no intent…and now I am yours. You are my every thought I am for your pleasure your pleasure alone…You have come to know my mind, my body & my soul the way a child might memorize his favorite fairy tale. My ecstasy is in yours. My joy is to see your joy, I’m shaking all over at how my devotion is consuming me. Master thank-you. ?

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